Saturday, June 30, 2007

Rainbow and Posie practice poor computer security

Yes, sometimes, I just don't have a story in me:

"What's your password?", asked Rainbow.

"Well, I don't think I should tell you", said Posie, "Then, it wouldn't be a secret."

"Oh, okay. Well, my password is very clever.", said Rainbow.

"Is it Fish?", asked Posie.

"How did you know?", said Rainbow.

"Well, it is your favorite thing in the whole wide world.", said Posie.

"Yes, it is. So is yours 'Cake'", said Rainbow.

"No," said Posie.

"Ice Cream?", said Rainbow.

"No.", Said Posie.

"Is it....hmmmmmmmmmmm", said Rainbow, "is it..... RAINBOW?"

"YES! How did you know.", said Posie, who was very surprised.

"Well, I just Guessed and there it was!", said Rainbow.

"Well, we'll both need new passwords. Something that no one else will think of.", siad Posie.

"Yes, indeed", said Rainbow.

So Rainbow and Posie picked new passwords for thier computers. And they did -not- tell each other what it was.

But, dear reader, I'll tell you what they were.

"Posie" was Rainbow's and "Fish" was Posie's new password.

The end.

Tuesday, June 26, 2007

The great fish and nut swap

One day Nutsy and Futsy decided that they did -not- have enough nuts to last the winter. In case you didn't know, Squirrels -love- nuts. Acorns, brazil nuts, peanuts, almonds, cashews, pecans, walnuts and so many others. They had a fair number of Acorns, but they had very refined taste.

So, it was time to go to the nuthouse. At the nuthouse, they'd be able to find all of the nuts they needed for winter.

So, they climbed down the tree and walked, and walked, and walked until they got to the nuthouse in the small town near the forest.

Inside was a kind old Cat named Chuco, who said, "Welcome to the nuthouse, my fine furred friends. Can I help you at all today?"

"Yes, we need some brazil nuts, peanuts, almonds, cashews, pecans and walnuts.", said Nutsy.

"Well, we have all of those. How much do you need?"

"We need enough for 1 winter for 4 squirrels."

"Okay, let me go in back and set that up."

So he did, he came out with a bill. "I can deliver this tomorrow for you if you like. Or today, but much later."

"Okay, sounds good to us."

So Chuco also owned the fish store next door. But, something happened that night. He meant to deliver many many buckets of fish to Rainbow and Posie, and many many barrels of nuts to the Squirrels.

But he made a mistake.

He sent the fish to the Squirrels and the nuts to the Cats.

This was -clearly- not right.

The cats, who like nuts just fine, wondered what the nuts were for.

The squirrels, who really really don't like fish, were outraged! Where were thier brazil nuts, peanuts, almonds, cashews, pecans, and walnuts? They should have been delivered by now.

So they called up the store.

"Hello?", said Chuco.

"Yes, hello. My name is Nutsy."

"Oh yes, Nutsy how are you? How are those nuts doing."

"I'm sure their fine, but all we have here are many many buckets of fish."

"OH NO!", said Chuco, realizing what he had done. "I'll be there very soon!"

And he was, he came and collected the the Fish and took them to Rainbow and Posie's house and took the brazil nuts, peanuts, almonds, cashews, pecans and walnuts over to the Squirrels.

They were very happy and since Chuco moved so fast, the Squirrels were able to have their brazil nuts, peanuts, almonds, cashews, pecans and walnuts in time for winter.

The End.

Monday, June 25, 2007

Posie Lost

One day, Rainbow was walking down the path that ran in the middle of the forest.

She was looking for her roommate, Posie. Posie had been gone all day! This made Rainbow a little worried.

First, she went to Elephants house and rang the doorbell.

"YESSSSS?", came the voice of Elephant.

"It's me, Rainbow", said Rainbow,"I'm looking for Posie, have you seen her?"

"No, I've not. Maybe you'll see her later.", said Elephant.

"Okay, thanks!", said Rainbow and she got back on the path. She soon came to sea otter's hutch.

"Sea otter? Are you there?", she said. But, there was no reply. Which was odd, Sea Otter almost never left his hutch before 2 or 3 o'clock pm.

So Rainbow walked to Nutsy's house and knocked on the door.

*knock* *knock* *knock*

"Who's there?", said Nutsy.

"Me! Rainbow.", said Rainbow, "Just wondering if you have seen Posie."

"Well, no, but have you seen Futsy, Sutsy and Klutsy?"

"Why no!", said Rainbow, "Are they lost?"

"No, probably not, but I'm, a little worried.", said Nutsy.

"Hmmm", said Rainbow, "maybe we shoud go out and look for them together?"

"Sure! That's a great idea. Let's start at the clearing."

"Good idea", said Rainbow.

So they walked to the clearing on the top of the hill. Rainbow was last and Nutsy was first. As they came over the top, Rainbow ran ahead, which, when you think about it, is a little weird. Nutsy chased after Rainbow and managed to slow her down a bit.

Nutsy made it to the top first, and then, Rainbow made it to the top.

WHERE ALL HER FRIENDS and Posie WERE WAITNG! And they all said, at once, "SURPRISE" .

It was a surprise party! And rainbow was very surprised, but, it was her birthday, so it was a very good surprise.

The End.

Sunday, June 17, 2007

Rainbow and Posie get a Haircut

One day, Rainbow and Posie woke up from a long nights sleep.

Rainbow looked at Posie.

Posie looked at Rainbow.

"Wow. We need haircuts, don't we?", said Posie.

"Yes", said Rainbow, "we most certainly do!"

So they got out of bed, went down the tree to the path at the base of the tree.

"Who should we have cut our hair?", asked Rainbow.

"Well, how about swingy?", said Posie.

"NO!", said Rainbow, " She'd make a huge mess of things, she'd make us look like -monkeys!"

"Hmm," said Posie, "Howsabout elephant?"

"Are you completely crazy?", said Rainbow,"Elephants our friend for sure, but do you want someone to weird a pair of scissors near our beautiful fur with a trunk?"

"Oh, I guess not," said Posie,"Well, how about Fingers?"

"Fingers is way too small.", said Rainbow.

"Well, if you're so smart, who do you think we should have cut our hair?"

"That's a good question", said Rainbow, who felt a little bad for shutting Posie's suggestions down. "Why don't we go about this a different way? Whose hair do we like?"

"Oh, sea otter, for sure", said Posie.

"Oh, yeah. Her hair is so beautiful and flows so nicely in the water. If our hair could flow as nicely in the air as sea otters does in the water, I'd be sooooo happy!"

"Me too.", said Posie, "Let's go and ask her who she has cut her hair!"

"Great idea, let's go!", said Rainbow.

And so they went. They went down the path to the stream and walked up the stream until they reached sea otters place.

*knock knock*

"Yes, who's there?", said Sea Otter from inside her hutch.

"It 's Rainbow and Posie!", said Rainbow and Posie.

"Oh,", sea otter said as she opened the door, "How are you?"

"Great, we have a question for you.", said Posie.

"Well Posie, what is it?"

"Who does your hair?"

"Oh, you won't believe me."

"Try me!", said Posie, "we both love your hair and want to get haircuts too!"

"Okay, but don't say I didn't warn you. I go to", sea otter paused for a moment, "in fact I have my hair done by elephant!"

"No!", said Rainbow.

"No way!", said Posie.

"Way!", said Sea Otter,"Elephants been my stylist for many many years now. She does a fantastic job. Go talk to her."

"Okay," Said Posie.

So they walked down to Elephants house and knocked on her door.

"Yes", said a deep voice from inside.

"Hi! We need haircuts.", said Rainbow.

"Well, okay.", Elephant said, opening the door,"Come on in."

They walked in and were led to a room with a haircutting chair and lots and lots of enormous scissors. They were a little frightened.

"So, who are you?", Elephant said.

"It's Rainbow and Posie!", said Posie,"You know us!"

"OH! I couldn't see you very well past all that fur. Okay hop onto the chair and we'll get started.

She began with Posie and then Rainbow and they were two of the best haircuts they had ever recived in their lives.

In the history of haircuts, these two kitty cuts would go down as the index example of the finest haircuts a cat could have.

But the story isn't over, you see, because when Rainbow hopped off the chair, she stepped onto the little lever at the base of the chair.

This lever made the chair itself POP up into the air a bit, and the towel on the back of the chair was, sadly, what elephant was standing on!

Elephant fell back, knocking over the stack of scissors!

"Oh no!", said Rainbow.

"Look out!", said Posie.

They dodged the scissors, but they were not fast enough to avoid being sprayed with shampoo.

*kerbloosh*

And Cats do -not- like being kerplooshed. They are on record as saying they do not like the post kerplooshing washing , with water, that ther must ensure. But the worst patrt was what happened when cats and an elephant were on a very slippery floor.

As you might imagine, they fell down, slid outside, down the path, into Sea Otters hutch, which, with an enormous splash, fell into the water. KERPLOOOOOSPLASH, it went, and everyone had to spend the day fixing Sea Otter's house and Elephant's hair cutting area.

The End.

Saturday, June 16, 2007

Infinite Cats!

One day, Rainbow and Posie were walking though the forest. They hadn't walked much lately, so they decided to have a day where all they did was walk.

They walked all the way up the mountain along the stream. They walked across the rickety bridge to the other mountain. They walked down that mountain and to to lake.

Along the way they saw lots of old friends, the squirrels, the elephant, the bunny, the spider and the ant, the bat and the monkey were all said "Hello" to. And all of them asked the same thing, "Going for a walk?"

"That's right", they would answer each and every time.

They walked and walked and walked, they took a sleeping break and walked some more. They were determined to walk until they were somewhere they had never been before.

And they indeed arrived at somewhere new.

It was a large building, very square and very tall. There was a sign out in front, which said "Scientific Cat Enterprises, ltd."

Rainbow said, "Well Posie, should we find out what's going on in this building."

"Sure, let's find out. Do you want me to knock?"

"Sure! Go ahead!"

So Posie knocked on the door.

*knock* *knock*

A little bit of time passed and they heard something....

"Who's there", a low cat's voice asked.

"Rainbow and Posie", Rainbow said.

"Rainbow?", the voice said, then the door opened.

It was the cat with the disappearing house!

"Hi!", Posie said,"We didn't know this was your building!"

"Yes, this is where I do my disappearing experiments. It's very difficult.", he said.

"Why is it difficult?", Rainbow asked.

"Well, they keep disappearing, of course!", he said, "It makes them very hard to find when you make a mistake. You wouldn't believe how many houses I've lost!"

"Wow! Really! What are you making disappear today?", Posie asked.

"Well, that's the exciting thing.", he said, "I'm not making -anything- disappear. I'm making things reappear, over and over and over again. Come and see!"

So they followed the cat into the building. This was no ordinary building. It was -stuffed- with machines, computers, wood, pipes, and all kinds of wires and things. Rainbow and Posie had never seen anything like it!

"What is all this stuff for?", asked Posie.

"Well", he said,"I need all this stuff for my experiment. Come see."

He walked them further and further into the building .They came to an elevator. The cat pushed the down button and he, Rainbow and Posie all went into the elevator car. Once inside they pressed the 'b' button and the elevator began to descend.

Once the door opened again, they were far underground in a vast, cavernous, room. It was lit dimly but there was enough light to see by.

"Why is it so dim?", asked Rainbow.

"Ah, too much light interferes with my experiments.", he said.

He took them to the middle of the large room. Sitting there was a bowl of cat food.

"Cat food!", said Posie, "I -love- cat food!"

"Me too", said Rainbow.

"Me too", said the scientist cat, That's why I've placed it on the target."

"The target?", Rainbow said.

"Yes, whatever sits on target I can make many of. Watch.", he said as he pulled out what looked like a remote control with only a few buttons.

He pressed the large red button.

THERE WAS A HUGE FLASH OF LIGHT AND SHARP *SNAP*!

Rainbow and Posie were a little scared by the noise and the light.

"It's okay", the science cat said, "Look at the target."

They looked where he was pointing. Indeed there were 2 cat bowls full of tasty cat food!

"Wow!", said both Rainbow and Posie.

"Is it okay to eat?", said Posie?

"Yes, it is....go ahead and try it. Who would like to go first?"

"Me!", said Rainbow.

"Me!", said Posie and they both walked toward the bowls. Sadly, they were looking where they were going and they ran into each other ,tripped and ran into science cat. Who fell, and when he fell, he fell on the big red button.

And Rainbow and Posie fell onto the target.

What do think happened?

*SNAP*

*FLASH*

And there were two Rainbows and TWO Posies and 4 bowls of tasty cat food.

But , that's not where to stopped. You see, the button in the remote was -stuck-

*SNAP*
*FLASH*

4 Posies!
4 Rainbows!
8 Bowls of cat food!

*SNAP*
*FLASH*


8 Posies!
8 Rainbows!
16 Bowls of cat food!

*SNAP*
*FLASH*

16 Posies!
16 Rainbows!
32 Bowls of cat food!

When would it stop!

*SNAP*
*FLASH*

32 Posies!
32 Rainbows!
64 Bowls of cat food!

Oh no! It was still going!

*SNAP*
*FLASH*

64 Posies!
64 Rainbows!
128 Bowls of cat food!

And, suddenly, KERPLAM! There was a great shuddering boom that seemed to come from everywhere.

And there were no more posies and rainbows or bowls of cat food being created.

"Meow!", said 64 Posies.
"Meow!", said 64 Rainbows.

128 Bowls of Cat food didn't say anything, because cat food -cannot- talk.

"Oh my goodness!", said science cat, "What have I done!"

"Well," 64 Posies said,"You've made a fair number of us."

"Indeed," 64 Rainbows said. "This is -quite- a pickle."

"I like Pickles," said 63 Posies.

"I don't like pickles," said 63 Rainbows.

"Wait a second," Said one Posie. "I hate Pickles!"

"And I love them!", said one Rainbow.

And that is how the original ones found each other. But, what to do with the 126 extra cats?

Well, if there's one thing we know, Cats and cat food and forests are always useful. So, 126 cats went up the elevator and went exploring. They went far and wide, and left the main forst to original Rainbow and Posie.

And that, my friends, is how every forest in the world got their own Rainbow and Posie. And because of this, every Forest a little more fun, a little more beautiful and , better yet, had two more great cats in it.

The End.

Friday, June 15, 2007

Bubblegum Adventure!

One day, the two cats, Rainbow and Posie, woke up and climbed down the tree where their house was. At the bottom, waiting for them, was Nutsy.

"Nutsy!", Said Rainbow, "What are you doing here? Are you waiting for us?"

"Oh, I hope we didn't forget anything....", said Posie.

"No, no, nothing like that", said Nutsy the squirrel, "I thought you'd be waking up soon, so I came over and wanted to see if you had been to the Bubblegum Store in town yet?"

"No! I've never heard of such a thing," said Rainbow.

"Really? It's all I've heard people talking about. It's pretty wonderful, from what I hear. They have Bubble gum, bubble dots, bubble gum lollipops, chicklets and I've heard that they even have 100 different colors of bubble gum tape! I really want to see it! Want to come with me?", she said.

"Wow!", said both Rainbow and Posie, "We'd love to come!"

And so they did. They walked and walked and walked and walked. Out of the forest, along the creek (they waved hi to sea otter) out of the woods onto the path which turned into the sidewalk which led to the town, where Barry's Bodacious Bubblegum Boutique was, right off of main street near the library.

There were big, clear windows through which Nutsy, Rainbow and Posie all could look into the happy store. They couldn't wait to go in! So they did!

*ding ding* went the door, as the two cats and Nutsy walked in.

"Welcome to my store!", said Bubblegum Barry, "If there is there is anything I could help you with, let me know."

"We will. Thanks!", said Posie, googley-eyed at the collection of bubblegum.

"OH MY GOSH!", said Rainbow, "POSIE! Come here! I ....just...realized something!"

"What!", said Posie.

"What is it!", said Nutsy.

"We're CATS! We've never eaten Bubblegum!"

"Wow! You're right, but I guess we could? Nutsy....have you ever had bubblegum?", asked Posie.

"Well, now that you mention it, I do not remember ever having tried it."

"Oh, it's okay for cats and squirrels", said Barry.

"Really?", said Posie, "I heard if you eat Bubblegum, it will stay in your tummy for 7 years."

"Is that true?", said Rainbow, who didn't want her tummy filled with never-ending gum.

"No!", said Barry, "That's just silly. That's never been true."

"Oh, okay. Phew!", said Rainbow.

"WOW!", they heard Nutsy exclaim from the other side of the room.

"What is it?", Rainbow asked.

"Look....at.....all....this....Bubbletape! I could do .....anything....with this. I could hang from the ceiling, I could wrap up a gift basket, I could tow a car, you name it! I've never seen so much bubbletape!"

"And soooo many colors!", added Rainbow.

"Yes, let's get some.", said Posie.

And that, dear readers, is when things started to go wrong!

You see, Rainbow decided to take hold of the end of a role of bubble tape. Little did she notice the stairs next to the bubbletape display. Worse yet, she did not see the carelessly left roller skate at the top of the stairs.

Which, as you might have guessed, she stepped onto.

As her feet fell out from under her, she grabbed onto the bubble tape. Which, promptly, began to unroll.

As Rainbow began to fall, slowly, but surely, down the steps, her fall slowed by the unraveling bubbletape. Posie though she could help by grabbing a hold of the unrolling tape.

Which she did.

Well, it stopped unrolling and started to stretch.......and stretch....and stretch like a big rubber band, and who, pray tell, was at the end of the band? Rainbow.

Well, Rainbow snapped back up the stairs and all the way across the room, where she slammed into the big display of Gum Balls. Which went, KERPLOSH, ALL OVER THE ROOM.

Some went in her mouth, which was tasty, but so many were on the floor that -everyone- in the store fell down, and all the gum went flying everywhere.

Probably the worst thing about it was that one solitary gumball managed to go, kersplot, into the fire alarm. Which, now thinking it was fire, turned on the sprinklers.

What do you think happens when sprinklers get a huge amount of gum wet? Yes....a sticky icky ooey gooey mess.

And if there is one thing a cat hates more than getting wet, it's getting -gummy- and wet.

Which is just what happened.

It was a remarkable mess. And poor Barry had to clean things up. Rainbow and Posie felt -terrible- that they had ruined yet another shop, so they gathered all their friends together and not only did they help Barry cleanup, they staffed his shop for weeks on end and everyone bought 1 whole yard of bubble tape.

They were all different colors.

The end!

Thursday, June 14, 2007

Rainbow and Posie go to the Computer Store

One day Rainbow and Posie decided to learn how to use the computer.

First, they needed a computer. So.... they hopped on a bus and drove down to the small computer store in town.

It was a little place, no bigger than Rainbow and Posie's treehouse and inside was a vast array of computers, parts and big monitors.

The computers and parts were old, and new, and dusty, and clean. Some were in thier boxes, taped up, and others were sitting out on the benches and chairs.

It was very messy.

Rainbow and Posie didn't know what to think! So they called thier friend Elephant....

"Elephant?", Rainbow said into the phone.

"Yes, Posie?", replied Elephant.

"Well, I'm Rainbow!", said Rainbow.

"Oh! I'm sorry, you sounded -just- like Posie!", said Elephant.

"That must be because we are twin cats!", said Rainbow.

"But you are two different colors!", Elephant said. He was right, too, Posie was the pretty orangey color that kittens are and Rainbow was a black and white kitty.

"Well, we're still twins, born on the same day. Cats can do that, you know, have two -different- kinds of kittens!", said Rainbow.

"Well, that's really neat. Anyhow, what can I do for you, Posie...I mean Rainbow?", asked Elephant.

"Well, we're at the computer store, and we're a little confused, we sure could use an old experienced computer elephant to help us out."

"Well, I'll be right there!", he said.

A few minutes later, Rainbow and Posie heard a very loud rumbling. They poked thier little kitten heads out the front door of the shop to see, to thier surprise, a gathering cloud of dust.

It got louder!

And louder!

And dustier!

And louder!

And dustier still!

It was Elephant coming to help them...

"Do you think he knows about the big, slippery, puddle of oil in front of the store?", Rainbow asked.

"No, I don't think he does.", said Posie, "and I'm worried."

She had good reason to be worried. Elephant indeed did not see the oil. And he didn't stop in time.

So. What happens when an elephant. A full grown. Enormous. Heavy. Computer excited. Elephant. Runs, headlong, into a big, puddle of oil and tries to stop.

Do you know?

He doesn't stop. At least not the way he wanted to.

In fact, he slides, very very quickly and slipperelly into the big, messy, complicated, computer store.

BAM!

CRASH!

KABOOM!

MEOW!

MEOW!

HOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNKKKKKKK!

CRASH!

*KABLOOSH*

And that's the sound it made, when Elephant slid, quickly, into the computer store.

It was incredibly messy. And the hedgehog who ran the store was -deeply- unhappy. So much so that he decided to ask Rainbow and Posie and Elephant to help him clean up and close up for the day.

Rainbow and Posie felt terrible about the poor hedgehog and his shop, so they helped him out for weeks and weeks and once they had made up for the damage that Elephant had caused, they purchased a computer from him.

Elephant helped them learn how to use it, but that's another story.

The End.

Welcome to the Forest!

This blog exists to collect a series of children's stories that I'm writing for my daughter Frannie.

Here's the story: Since she was about 3 I've told her these made up stories about a bunch of animals in the forest, they are, roughly in order of creation:
    Squirrels:
      Nutsy
      Sutsy
      Futsy
      Klutsy

    Cats:
      Rainbow
      Posie

    Elephant the Elephant
    Swingy the monkey
    Flappy the bat.
    Fingers the spider
    Ant.
    Floppity hopity bunny
    Deedee and Neil and Hunter

    And from the next door forest:

    Mountain Lion
    Bear

    And the Cat whose house appears and disappears.
Most of the stories center around crazy messy disasters, with the funniest one to date being the visit to the fireworks, olive oil, flour, honey and candy store.